By Dylan F.
As an only child, you tend to learn two very important lessons in life: How to find something to do when you have no one else to play with, and how important all different kinds of relationships are. I was fortunate enough to learn one of these lessons before I started going to camp (and I’m lucky I did because I would have had a very boring childhood otherwise). It wasn’t until camp where I learned the 2nd all important “only child lesson”.
Back when I was in Carmel (summer of 2011), I vividly remember how big of a “hype” there was for Carmel-Chavurah Day. Everyone couldn’t wait to get paired to their buddies. I don’t really remember personally being too excited about it. It was my first year at camp and I was a little scared to create friendships with new people. I for sure wasn’t ready to meet a kid twice my age who I was supposed to create some sort of connection with, but it turns out, I was wrong. I absolutely loved it and my buddy was amazing. His name was Tyler and we hit it off instantly.
Being able to create such a friendship with someone so much older than me really changed how I viewed kids of that age group (back then it felt like they were adults). Even though it seemed like he was so much older than me, it didn’t take me long to see that we weren’t that different. He was in my shoes just seven short years ago, and that finally helped me see that, with friendships, age really is just a number.
I have lost most contact with Tyler over the years, and we haven’t really seen each other since that summer back in 2011, but my short friendship with Tyler helped me truly understand how important relationships you create at camp are. So, ever since Carmel, I have strived to do my best to make and sustain all sorts of relationships I come across at camp. Whether that be camper to counselor, camper to camper, or even Carmel to Chavurah buddies. This past summer I think I really understood what that last one meant more than ever.
Being on the Carmel side of the buddy pair was great, but to me, nothing compared to last summer, when I finally got to be a Chavurah buddy. I was fortunate enough to be able to go double session last year, so I had the privilege of getting two awesome buddies. Their names were Sean and Matthew. Sean was my first session buddy and the moment I met him, he was full of energy and enthusiasm for camp and pretty much life itself. I admired his multitude of talents and how genuine he was toward me, someone who he just met. My second session buddy Matthew was equally as jubilant. I admired his undoubted persistence and high level of confidence. Matthew was so outgoing too. It always made my day when suddenly, I would hear a voice yell, “Hi Dylan!”, and it would always be Matthew, eager to say hi.
These two kids meant the world to me over the summer, and they still do throughout the year. I try to keep in contact with my buddies as best as I can. I gave them my email and number and let them know they can both reach out to me whenever they need it, or whenever they just want to say hi. I feel this is something that is so important to do for many reasons. The first is that demonstrating openness and helping your buddy understand how important it is to keep in contact with everyone you become close with at camp is a great value to impart to them. I’m probably not going to win the “best at keeping in contact with people you met at camp” award anytime soon, but the most I can do at this point is put two kids who look up to me on the right path to taking home such an award. It always makes my day whenever I get a text or email from one of my buddies, updating me on their lives. I have many “dad” moments where I can’t help being undeniably proud of them. There is no doubt that they are going to do great things when they grow up, and hopefully, put many other future campers on the right track to creating long term relationships with everyone they meet at camp.
Thanks to these two kids, and many counselors along the way, I can officially say that I have learned the 2nd “only child lesson” that I mentioned before. I now know how important these camp relationships are. I would like to offer one last piece of advice to any new camper who is nervous about trying to create friendships at camp: Don’t be nervous… because I can guarantee you that there is someone seven years older, who went through the same experience seven years ago, who wants to be your friend. Trust me, you’re going to want to be their friend too.
Camp Harlam is a place like no other
Where friends become just like sisters and brothers
It is quite hard to describe our camp experience in words
But hopefully we can tell it just like it was originally heard
We started in Carmel, it was our first year
Not knowing what we signed up for, minds still filled with fear
We had no friends and are parents were there
And no one to help us lighten the load that we bare
So, we had to branch out and find new relationships
People who were caring, people who were patient
Which is what we did, we made a few friends
We found people who were caring and would be there till the end
Our first year was over and we had such a great time
We left with some memories and a few Jewish values in mind
But it didn’t yet stick, what Harlam really was
We needed to come back and experience more of the camp buzz
Fast forward 6 years and here we are today
It’s our last year and we have just a few more things to say
We finally get it; what camp is all about
It’s about believing, seeing, and yelling till your voice goes out
It’s about living life to the fullest and not caring what people think
It’s about being yourself and letting all other worries shrink
It’s about that first kiss, that big crush
And that person that you love so much
It’s about welcoming others to this special place
And maybe knowing when your unit head needs a little space
It’s sad that some of us may forget these things
It sometimes seems like our memories have wings
They get up and fly away
Only to return on our darkest of days
While our camper experience may be through, and some of us may never return
It’s very important not to let the camp spirit die or burn
But as we leave here, and continue on with our lives
Just always remember camp when you see those stars in the sky
(Poem written by Dylan F., Alex F., and Ben B. in the Summer of 2017)
Dylan F. has been a camper at Harlam since 2011. This summer he was in Israel on the NFTY-Harlam trip. He is from Springfield, VA.